Random Stuff

Too many thoughts and words are running through my head today.  I have more writing to do, but for 3 different stories.  I'm scared to death that nothing will ever get completed.  Why is that?  Why can't I finish something?  I guess I just need to let go of something and say it's "done."  But it never is.  *sigh*  For some reason, I want to keep improving things.  House repairs, projects, stories, relationships, the children... myself.  I should have gone for that long walk this morning.  Instead I put laundry away, which increased the feeling that things are never completed.  I've been working on one story for 12 years.  TWELVE YEARS!   Will the thing ever be completed?  I doubt it.  It'll be one long run on sentence.  It will be the story that never ends.... kind of like my "to do" list.  Now I want to work in the backyard.  I have to move one bush.  But it will be a game of tetris in the backyard or like the book "If you give the mouse a cookie..."  However, it'll be more like "If you move the bush to where the playset is, you'll have to move the playset."  yadda yadda yadda. 
Rambling helps.  It's like a little spurt from a volano.  It releases just enough to ease the pressure.  In a way I'm hoping for a big explosion of kinetic energy.  But I'm betting on more build up. 

2011.1 Lists

I'm making lists. And I'm including everything that I do already so I feel like I'm accomplishing something on my list. This year, I'm writing my list of things that I want to accomplish for the month in hopes that I am proactive and not reactive. (Granted, when it comes to that point, I'm about as reactive as Chernobyl....and that is not a good thing...... for anyone...trust me.)

So for January, my list of things I want to accomplish is as follows:
*read
*write at least 2000 words a week (500 words 4 times a week)
*excercise
*finish de-hoarding my house
*the normal stuff: laundry, vacuum, clean/dust bathrooms, etc.
*acknowledge the kids and the husband at least once a day
*Smile more :)
*take the dog for a walk 3 times a week
*keep up on the calendar (both filling it in and making it to appts w/o forgetting (sorry E & N)

I'm sure I'll forget things. That's just how my mind operates, er rather, doesn't, at this point. No resolutions this year. Can't remember what they are/were anyway. Hopefully I remember to look at this list so I know what I'm supposed to be doing. And if I forget something, well, guess I'll have to suit up for another Chernobyl meltdown....

Tis the Season

May you and yours have a wonderful Christmas. Luke 2 is my favorite passage for the telling of the story of Jesus's birth.

Take a minute to sit back. Ponder where you are with your life. Are you who you wanted to be? Are you where you wanted to be? If not, make those changes this next year. Be a better you. Treat those around you better, too. That's my goal.

Make it count. Every little thing you do each and every day. Make it all count.

The start of it all.....

Tea with Jane and Bill

Anxiety was thick. "Would he come," thought she? "What if he changed his mind?" Pacing between the large entry way and the small sitting room window of her sister's modest home, Jane couldn't rest until she heard the clammering of the horses coming up the drive. Butterflies turned somersaults in her insides as she ran through the possibilities of such an opportunity. Excited, nervous, scared, happy. Laughing at herself, she wondered if he would revel in her beauty, or treat her as a child. "Where are those horses?" she picked up her pacing.

In the back of the carriage, something called a Phaeton, William couldn't stop tapping his thumb on the edge of the seat. Staring out at the vast countryside, he was not accustomed to chaperones and personal attendants. He was a lone man wanting to get this day concluded. How could he have agreed to such a lowering of himself? What had he assigned himself? What was even more absurd than meeting with a woman of her class, was that she thought herself an equal in the written word. How can a supposed educated woman think herself anywhere near the caliber of stature as he?

To be continued......

Foreshadowing apologies

Okay, I'm going to be honest here and let you all know a secret. (okay, all 4 of you are now sworn to secrecy.)

I am going to be mixing and trying something new. It most likely won't turn out, but I'll try anyway. I'm wondering what would happen if Jane Austen and William Shakespeare collaborated. Or if you could Austenize Shakespeare.

Wish me luck.

To do lists

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to not have a hundred things to do? I wonder that every day. Every single blessed day. Usually I have lists of what needs done, bought, followed up on, etc. Sometimes I even make lists of the lists I need to make. That's when I know it's bad.

I also wonder if anyone else completely shuts down when things seem so overwhelming. It's too much. It seems pointless to even try to get things done. Why bother? Well, after watching an episode of Hoarders, let me tell ya, that's motivation all wrapped up in a pretty little "in your face" kind of show without the odors. Forget the lists, I'm going in head first. Trash bags, elbow length rubber gloves, windex and paper towels. Throw in some duct tape and super glue and I'm your girl to get whatever needs done, done.

But wait, I really should make a to do list so I can keep track of where I need to start. Urgh. Here we go again, square one.